A new step

As a child you know if you are born with an illness, its apart of your life, it sometimes hurt; however you are more able to be optimistic. Being an adult when a new event hits you between the eyes we are sometimes devastated, not because we are more or less able to cope, but because we have lived our lives knowing this is the way it has been for so long and now it has changed. For example a child born blind never knows what it is like to see so will never miss it, however a young person losing his sight will surly need emotional support.

The point is I sometimes wish I was able to start being me when I was younger, my girlfriend calls me 'HE', 'HIM' and 'MR.', it feels good, but I know it was not always this way so I sometimes feel conscious, none the less I feel its great to be acknowledged as Mr. *******.

I woke up this morning feeling depressed, being in a women's hostel, feeling family-less, confused about housing, wanting to start treatment, I really just wanted to talk to my counsellor, he could help I thought.

I went in to my appointment an hour early and spoke to a member of staff at gender matters they helped me out by making phone calls and possibly will get me into a trans friendly hostel closer to my support group, training and my old job, life would somewhat go back to a bit of normality- it’s what is best for me right now I think. I regret not going to them in the first place.

My blogs are like my mind very scattered and it could be the noise around me as well, I can barely concentrated in my writer's world...loll.

Until next time then